


Nightmares and Daydreams

by insomniasketch



Category: Renegades - Marissa Meyer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-10-30 12:56:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17828984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insomniasketch/pseuds/insomniasketch
Summary: Alter egos are revealed and it's very sad. It is kind of dark, and it may be triggering (suicide attempt), so proceed with caution.





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> This one is a lot darker than what I normally write, so tread lightly because I sure as hell didn't.

Nova smiled weakly, thinking of all the happy memories she and Adrian had shared. But it turned into a frown as she stared at the gun in her hand. Her vision blurred as she started to slowly raise the gun towards her temple, a single tear escaping her eye. Then her attention snagged on the communicator band, its screen bright with a message—from Adrian.

How are you feeling? Ruby told me you called in sick to HQ today.

Another tear slipped. And another, and another. Her band lit up again and she tried to read the message through her tears

Nova? If you don't respond soon, I'm going to go looking for you.

Nova glanced around at her surroundings. She was sitting in the middle of the floor in Ace's Cathedral, her knees pulled close to her chest and her back to the door. She was dressed in her Nightmare disguise, though she was missing the mask. It wouldn't do much good for Adrian—or any of the other Renegades for that matter—to find her like this. What did it matter anymore? Ace was as good as dead as long as he was in Renegades custody. And as much as she hated to admit it, it probably wouldn't be too long until Honey and Leroy were gone as well. As for Phobia, he'd be fine on his own.

Why are you at the old cathedral? Nevermind, just stay where you are. I'll be there in a few minutes.

Nova looked back to the gun and began to lower it. Thinking about how it would destroy Adrian to find her like this. But, what did it matter anymore? They could never be together. After all, he was the son of her enemies. She slowly began to raise the gun again, repeating the words she had said only a little over ten years ago, “Pull the trigger. Pull the trigger, Nova.” But she couldn't bring herself to do it. The band lit up again.

I'm here, where are you?

She ignored the message, still holding the gun to her head. The door behind her creaked open and she heard footsteps slowly approach her.

“Nightmare?” Adrian's voice called, the footsteps becoming quieter. A bolt shot from somewhere behind her and knocked the gun out of her hand. Her arm dropped limply and she turned around to face him, shocked to see the Sentinel standing where Adrian should have been.

“Adrian?” Nova asked, hating that her voice shook a little. The Sentinel nodded and began unlatching his visor. It lifted up to reveal the face of Adrian Everhart. Sweet, handsome, brilliant Adrian Everhart.

“Nova?” Adrian stuttered out. “You’re Nightmare?” Nova nodded and glanced towards where the gun had landed. She slowly stood up and turned to face him. Noticing that his shoulders were tense and his face was drawn. Nova took a tentative step forward, then her shoulders slumped and she broke into sobs.


	2. Part Two

“How could you!” she screamed, glancing up at Adrian, noticing that he was crying as well.

“How could I? Great skies, Nova! You were the one about to—” Adrian hesitated, losing all the gumption he had had before “—what the hell were you thinking?”

“I was thinking about how my life has fallen apart!” Nova yelled, throwing her arms up in frustration.

“But you have so much to live for,” Adrian said, adding, “Nightmare or not.”

“Like what, Adrian?” Nova snapped, trying her best to ignore the Nightmare comment.

Adrian looked down, almost sheepishly. “Like our future together.”

How could he think about a thing so trivial as that at a time like this? Oh, damn Adrian Everhart! “As long as it's Renegades vs. Anarchists, we have no future together. I'm sorry, Adrian, but it never would have worked.” She paused, then added harshly, “Will never work.”

Adrian's face fell, “You’re right. But, Nova, I'm willing to forgive you, and we can try to make it work.”

Nova resisted the urge to shout at him. “Will you just give it up already? It will never work, Adrian. For so many reasons. Even though you may be able to forgive me, I don't think I could ever forgive you.” she said through gritted teeth.

“And why is that? What I have I done that is so unforgivable?” Adrian practically yelled at her.

“You really don't know, do you?” Nova drawled, Adrian raised an eyebrow questioningly. “10 years ago, when I was six, I hid in my closet as my family was murdered. I had believed that the Renegades would come, but they didn't. It was my uncle who saved me, my Uncle Alec. But you probably know him as Ace Anarchy.” Nova tried to calm herself, instead the gunshots kept replaying over and over in her mind.

Bang. Bang.

She took in a few shaky breaths, but that didn't help. Nova tried to will the sound away, but nothing worked. The gunshots kept on replaying over and over again.

Bang. Her mother was dead.

Bang. Her father was dead.

Bang. Evie was dead.

She blinked her eyes rapidly, trying to dispel the image of her family. Adrian stared at her with uncertainty. Presumably wondering if he should comfort her or keep his guard up. Nova wanted to jump into his arms, to cry and let out every thought and emotion.

A scream pierced through the air, and Nova crumpled to her knees. She couldn't take it anymore, the gunshots wouldn't stop.

Bang. Bang.

Arms wrapped around her, comforting and protective. Though they weren't the arms of the Sentinel, they were the arms of Adrian Everhart. She began to calm down, the sound of gunshots slowly receding. Nova attempted to pull away, but Adrian held her tighter.

“Nova, how could you attempt such a thing?” Adrian sobbed.

“I already told you. I have nothing to live for,” Nova whispered in response.

“But you have us to live for!—” Adrian hesitated, his features taking on a melancholy look “—I used to dream of us getting married one day and having a happily ever after. But I don't think that can happen now.”

“Happily ever after only exists in fairy tales. And this is no fairy tale,” Nova replied, rather cynically. Adrian pulled away slightly so he could look her in the eyes, moving his hands to rest upon her shoulders.

“Those weren't the only dreams I had. I also dreamt of our first kiss and our second. You're the girl of my dreams—” Nova cut him off.

“Nova McLain can be the girl in your daydreams, but Nova Artino will be the girl in your nightmares.” Adrian took on an almost startled looking expression, she would have laughed if not for the severity of the situation. She glanced towards the gun, quickly calculating how fast she would have to move in order to grab it. Only a few seconds and she decided to take the risk. Nova jumped up and ran over to the gun, promptly picking it up and raising it.

“No!” Adrian screamed, scrambling to stand up. “Nova—” He tackled her to the ground as she pulled the trigger. The gunshot rang throughout the cathedral, the bullet lodging itself into a wall on his right. He turned to Nova, she was sprawled on the ground, alive. Adrian sat down beside Nova, then gathered her into his arms.

“Adrian, why did you save me?” she croaked out.

“Because...because I love you,” Adrian confessed. “And I don't really care that you're Nightmare. Yeah, that complicates things, but we’ll work through it.”

“Adrian, I love you too. But it will never work out. I'm an Anarchist and you're a Renegade. To run off with you would be like betraying my family. And I can't do that. Not after all that they've done for me.” Nova looked up at him and smiled weakly, though it didn't reach her eyes. Adrian held her tighter, not wanting to ever let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! I finally updated. It's a Christmas miracle (even though it's technically past one AM my time, but we'll just ignore that). It's not as emotional as I would have liked, but I was watching Danny Gonzalez while writing this and it's kind of hard to write something sad when you're laughing. I think this story is done, but I'm open to suggestions on how to continue it.


End file.
